my son is going to be a serial killer....

I can see it now.

Or maybe he won't be but I am seriously worried about it after tonight.

You know how they look back into a murderer's past and say, "dude used to torture small animals, it only escalated from there", well document today people because it's the milestone in my three year old's serial future.

Cohen. killed. our. cat. I'm not even kidding. The poor thing loved him even though he was sooo maul-y with him. Cohen would grab the cat (have you noticed yet the cat had no name? an omen perhaps?) and bundle him in a blanket and sit down to watch tv. The cat would stay put (he knew how the boy rolled.) Then after Cohen was off in dreamland, you'd find the cat all cuddled up to Cohen purring away. (What's that about victims being sympathetic to their abusers?)

Cohen is a mischievous boy, to say the least. Once I found the cat in a dresser drawer. Another time in the portion of the coffee table top that opens into a storage area. Once he shoved the cat down into the back of the couch and to get it out Rob and I had to flip the couch onto it's front. So I guess he sounds a bit sadistic right about now but he really did care about this cat. He fed the kitty, and pet the kitty and kept the puppy from using the kitty as a chew toy. (poor kitty)

What happened tonight was very tragic and yet morbidly humourous at the same time. Wait, you'll see why. After school our neighbours 5 year gets off the bus and stays here until either parent or his grandma pick him up. Tonight he wanted to stay longer so I agreed. In retrospect this was the defining moment. His presence here meant I had 3 wired boys as opposed to 2. They were WILD. This boy also loves the cat. He loves it as much as Cohen does, if you catch my drift (shit a neighbourhood full of potential inmates-Cohen might just luck out with a cell mate from his choldhood).

Ok, this is what we gather happened, Cohen and neighbour kid hunted out the cat. At some point Cohen attempted to put the cat in the aforementioned coffee table cubby. The cubby has a hinged lid type area. Cohen was ON the coffee table. Poor kitty ended up half in/half out of this cubby and somehow Cohen ended up squashing him. I'm pretty sure it was instant since NO ONE noticed. Including the 10 year old and 8 year old who were in the living room watching tv.

Poor kitty. I really miss him. But here's the morbid humour. Cohen didn't realize anything was wrong with kitty.(you see where this is going?)  He chased his older brother and the neighbour boy around the living room/dining room/kitchen/foyer circle holding the cat out as if the cat was "gonna get them". Still NO ONE NOTICED!! At this point Rob declares it's time for neighbour child to head home as it's getting seriously loud and wild and out of control. I go into the living room to settle them down, turn to Cohen who was lying ON the cat (not abnormal for him to this either). As per usual I shoo Cohen away from the cat so the cat has a chance, however slim, to escape for a few minutes, when I realize the cat is NOT moving. I panic and call Rob over thinking Cohen had just suffocated kitty. We realize at this point that this had not just happened and of course my big mouth had just informed 5 kids that the damn cat was d.e.a.d.

Cassie starts bawling, Ryan was more curious than anything, Neighbour boy didn't seem fazed at all and Cohen wanted to play with the damn thing. Ashton was crawling around, had to keep him away. My oh-so-manly husband would not touch it. He went to get the dustpan (it's a really small 7 month old cat).

I took Cohen aside to try to find out how and when this all went down. He put his two little hands on each side of my face, looks me in the eyes and says, "Don't worry, mommy, cat is dead. In 2 or 3 days we'll have a new one." I think maybe we need to reconsider video games, he now thinks when things die you wait a bit and they come back. Not quite pet sematary here kid. (that's how the movie spelled it right?)

I miss the cat. Right now he would be cuddling on my bed, purring away. Instead, he's in a shoe box in the back porch.

And I am not going to bed until my future Ted Bundy falls asleep. Gotta watch my back from now on.